Jimmy Kimmel Live! Highlights

Here were my favorite monologue jokes from last night’s Jimmy Kimmel Live!:

Once again it was freezing in much of the country, except here where it was 71 degrees… above zero. Experts say if you’re in any of the heavily snowed-in areas the best way to stay warm is to try and convince Randy, Steven and J Lo to send you to Hollywood.

Tonight the judges traveled to San Francisco – that’s one way to get Steven Tyler to stop hitting on the contestants. If you’re watching American Idol regularly this year Steven Tyler is apparently under the impression he’s part of a reality dating show. He looks at these young girls like a Rottweiler looks at roast beef.

Lindsey Lohan was back in court today charged with felony grand theft for allegedly stealing a $2500 necklace from a jewelry store. This is actually a step up for Lindsey. You know all of her previous arrests were drugs and DUI’s. Thieving jewels is kind of a classy crime. I don’t know why she needed a necklace; the police gave her an ankle bracelet for free. If she’s found guilty she could go back to jail for three years. I guess the message here is the jewelry stores are allowed to rob us the week before Valentine’s Day, but when we do it it’s “illegal” all of a sudden.


Adam Sandler was the first couch guest. He stars in the new film Just Go With It. I’ve always liked Adam’s sense of humor, so I thought the interview was pretty entertaining. He had some funny stories. I’m not sure if they were true or not, but they were fun nevertheless. Here’s a clip of the middle of the interview:


Bobby Flay was the second couch guest. He is a chef whose cooking show is called Throwdown with Bobby Flay. He and Jimmy threw down against each other over eggplant parmesan. It was a terrific segment and I highly recommend you watch it:



Ke$ha was the musical guest. She was, ah, fine, I guess.

Really good show. I give it:

– Woody

Posted In: Late Night