Jimmy Kimmel Live! Highlights

Here were my favorite monologue jokes and bits from last night’s Jimmy Kimmel Live!:

Did those of you who have iPhones update your operating systems today? Apple, today, released iOS 8, which means we finally have more versions of iOS than Police Academy movies.

There are some impressive new features that come with the iOS 8. There’s a “family sharing” feature that you won’t set up. There’s a “predictive typing” thing you won’t be able to figure out how to work. And you can create your own widgets. I mean, you won’t, but you can.

Police in South Korea arrested an American man who was trying to swim across the Han River so he could meet North Korean leader Kim Jong Un. Corse, the guy didn’t make it across, primarily because he kept running into all the people trying to swim away from Kim Jong Un. But still, the best way for an American to meet Kim Jong Un is to become a cross-dressing basketball player with a drinking problem.

The comedy segment bit was “Dear Aunt Chippy.” It was decent, but not worth your time.

Ty Burrell was the first couch guest. He is on the show Modern Family and in the film The Skeleton Twins. The interview was good. Ty was nice, down-to-earth and told some amusing stories. He was a solid guest in every sense of the word. Here’s most of the first-half of the interview:

Len Goodman was the second couch guest. He is a judge on Dancing with the Stars. The interview was great. Len was a ton of fun. Jimmy could have spent the entire hour just talking to Len and I wouldn’t have been bored for a second. The entire interview is worth watching, but ABC has only posted roughly half of it in two clips. It’s a crime, honestly.

Paolo Nutini was the musical guest. I enjoyed his performance:


An almost flawless show. I give it:


– Woody

Posted In: Late Night