Conan Highlights

Here were my favorite monologue jokes from last night’s Conan:

Did you all watch soccer yesterday? Guess what. I’m not going to get to ask you that for another four years. Germany won. That was the big news. Some of the Germans actually smiled when they won, which is against the law. Germany won, but they’re still mad at us for spying on them, so they’re considering going back to using typewriters to avoid being spied on. Yeah, it’s never good news when Germany says, “We’re going to go back to our old ways.”

This weekend Dawn of the Planet of the Apes was the number one movie at the box office. Yeah, in other “talking ape” news, Bravo has renewed The Real Housewives of New Jersey.

This weekend a Baltimore Raven’s cornerback became the fifth Raven to be arrested this off-season. Now, on the upside, the Baltimore State Prison is about to have one hell of a football team.

The comedy segment bit was Conan informing us that he’s in the upcoming television movie Sharkopus Vs Pteracuda on the SyFy channel. It premieres August 2nd. Conan’s announcement had some amusing moments, but it’s not worth spending your time to watch.

Jason Biggs was the first couch guest. He is on the show Orange Is the New Black. The interview was entertaining. Jason was friendly, engaging and put humor into stories that normally wouldn’t have any. He also found ways to slip in hilarious comments when both Omar and Ellie were talking with Conan. Here’s my favorite part of the interview; I really liked how Jason, Conan and Andy all get solid comedic moments:

Omar Gonzalez was the second couch guest. He plays for the LA Galaxy soccer team. The interview was good. Omar was relaxed, a great-sport (pun unintentional) and told some interesting stories. If you like men who have a lot of charisma and abs you can grate cheese on, then this clip is for you:

Ellie Kemper was the third couch guest. She is in the new movie Sex Tape. The interview was fine. Ellie was pleasant, had a nice sense of humor and shared some funny tidbits. She laughed a lot and genuinely looked like she was having an exciting time. Here’s the first four-fifths of the interview:

Enjoyable show. I give it:


– Woody

Posted In: Late Night