Jimmy Kimmel Live! Highlights

Here were my favorite monologue jokes from last night’s Jimmy Kimmel Live!:

It’s good to be back. We were on vacation last week. Every once in a while we do that. We have to; you know, we’re working like an hour and a half here, every day.

I went fly fishing in the Bahamas to relax. I was fishing for what they call “bonefish.” When you catch them they run like hell. When you hook them you have to let them go, you have to let them run until they get tired. Then you reel them in. Then they make another run for it. And again you let them go until they get tired, then you reel them in again. You keep doing that over and over again until they give up. It’s the same philosophy I use when it comes to women.

The Clippers may have found themselves a new owner. On Friday night the NBA approved a bid made by former Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer to buy the team for two billion dollars. He actually didn’t even want to buy the team, but the law says that if you have two billion dollars lying around, and your name has the word “ball” in it, legally you have too.

There was no comedy segment bit.

Dr. Phil was the first couch guest. He is the host of the show Dr. Phil. The interview was great. Dr. Phil was funny, sharp and shared some interesting insights. The banter between Dr. Phil and Jimmy was entertaining to watch. They both got in some hilarious jabs at each other. The entire interview is worth checking out, but the segment by itself isn’t available online for me to post. So here are some clips:

Sage Steele was the second couch guest. She hosts the show NBA Countdown. The interview was good. Sage was pleasant, outgoing and told some amusing stories. I really like Sage’s personality. She displays a lot of charisma, intelligence and strength without breaking a sweat. Here’s most of the interview:

was the musical guest. She gave a fine performance. Not really my kinda music, but, whatever.

Enjoyable show. I give it:

rating_3.5_Woodys

– Woody

Posted In: Late Night