Jimmy Kimmel Live! Highlights

Here were my favorite monologue jokes from last night’s Jimmy Kimmel Live!:

After sixteen days the government shutdown is over as of today. I’ve been watching cable news all day. Some of these guys in Congress are acting like it’s a big achievement. If you pick up a gun and don’t shoot yourself in the leg with it that’s not really that big of an achievement. But some of them seem to think it is. Some of them don’t, however. Right now a devastated Ted Cruz is filibustering a squirrel on the lawn of the Capitol building.

If everyone signs off tonight the government will temporarily reopen until January fifteenth, the debt ceiling will be raised until February seventh and then we’ll do this all over again. Why do we even have a debt ceiling? Why can’t we just get rid of the debt ceiling, have a convertible government and feel the wind in our national hair?

The comedy segment bit was Kids Table – Government Shutdown. It involved kids saying stupid things and bad editing. I didn’t like it.

Danny McBride was the first couch guest. He stars on the show Eastbound & Down. The interview was entertaining. Danny was personable, mellow and told some funny stories. I’ve never been a big fan of Danny’s comedic abilities, but I do think he does a nice job talking one-on-one with someone. I know that sounds silly, but a lot of actors don’t do it as well as you’d think. Here’s the interview:

After the break Danny was joined by his co-star Steve Little. The interview just got better, honestly. Steve was great and his stories were hilarious:

Chiwetel Ejiofor was the second couch guest. He stars in the new film 12 Years A Slave. The interview was very good. Chiwetel was charismatic, pleasant and told some interesting stories. The segment should have been a lot longer, however. Kimmel barely had enough time to scratch the surface of Chiwetel’s life. If Chiwetel blows up, like people are anticipating after his film comes out, Kimmel he may never get another chance. Here’s the interview:

Arctic Monkeys was the musical guest. They gave a fine performance.

Enjoyable show. I give it:

rating_3.5_Woodys

– Woody

Posted In: Late Night