Jimmy Kimmel Live! Highlights

Here were my favorite monologue jokes from last night’s Jimmy Kimmel Live!:

We are less than a half hour away from the fourth of July; a celebration of our independence from England and our dependence on alcohol.

I do miss the old days when you could buy fireworks without having to drive an unmarked van down the Mexico. Fireworks are illegal here in LA. If you live in LA and want to blow stuff up you have to be Michael Bay directing something.

Dennis Rodman told Sports Illustrated he believes he should be nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize. Unfortunately, Rodman is not eligible for a Nobel Prize. In order to be nominated you have to have been married to Carmen Electra for at least two weeks, and they only lasted nine days.

The comedy segments were Kids Explain the National Anthem and Cooking with Fireworks. They were both decent enough to recommend sitting through:

Michael C. Hall was the first couch guest. He stars on the show Dexter. The interview was fine. Michael was nice, mellow and told some amusing stories. This is the third time I’ve reviewed Michael as a guest on a late-night talk show, and the third time I’ve rated his appearance as “fine.” Michael is a cool guy and a talented actor, so I don’t know why his segments haven’t been better.  There certainly isn’t anything wrong with them, they just seem to missing something. Here’s my favorite section of the interview:

Miranda Cosgrove was the second couch guest. She lends her voice to the film Despicable Me 2. The interview was good. Miranda was pleasant, had an excellent sense of humor and told some interesting stories. Even though I’ve never seen iCarley, or know anything about her,  I enjoyed hearing about her being a film major at USC. I would have had no problem listening to more of her adventures if there had been more time. Here’s the interview:

ZZ Ward was the musical guest. She was great:

Entertaining show with bonus points for being the only one working this week. I give it:



Posted In: Late Night