Late Show Highlights

Here were my favorite monologue jokes from last night’s Late Show with David Letterman:

Well, you folks are in a good mood, and I know why: the hockey lockout is over. A lot of people say, “Dave, I don’t know what that means.” Well, it means that we’ve had no hockey. Had no hockey in October. Had no hockey yesterday. I mean it got so bad that Disney On Ice actually allowed fighting.

A team of scientists in Scotland have developed a computer that writes jokes. The good thing about a computer that writes jokes: the jokes may not be that funny, but at least it doesn’t take off the Jewish holidays.

You know who’s in trouble again? Lindsey Lohan. She was in court again today. I tell you, she’s been sworn in so many times she has Bible elbow. By the way, that joke was written by a computer.

Michael Strahan was the first couch guest. He is a co-host of the morning talk show Live! with Kelly and Michael. The interview was good. Michael was the same friendly, amusing and charismatic guy I watched when he was on the show a few months ago. They spent a majority of the segment discussing football and the upcoming playoffs. Here are some clips:

Jessica Chastain was the second couch guest. She stars in the new film Zero Dark Thirty. The interview was great. Jessica was pleasant, well-spoken and fun. Most of the interview was an interesting discussion about the film, but Letterman found a way to sneak in some entertaining teasing. Here’s a clip:

Conor Maynard was the musical guest. He was decent.

Fine show. I give it:

– Woody

Posted In: Late Night