Late Show Highlights

Here were my favorite monologue jokes from last night’s Late Show with David Letterman:

The Yankees had some trouble in the playoffs. Here was the problem: Derek Jeter broke his ankle and could not play. The other part of the problem: Alex Rodriguez did not break his ankle and could play.

You know what happened earlier tonight: the final presidential debate for this presidential campaign. Pundits are saying that the first debate was won by Mitt Romney. Now, pundits are also saying that the second debate was probably won by President Obama. Whoever wins the third debate, that’s the one held tonight, will meet the Tigers in the World Series.

Latest polls indicate six percent of registered voters are undecided. MAKE UP YOUR MIND! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. TWO YEARS? YOU DON’T KNOW WHO YOU’RE GONNA VOTE FOR? YOU’RE NOT UNDECIDED, YOU’RE IDIOTS. PICK ONE. COME ON. Those are the guys you see at Baskin Robbins asking for free samples.

The comedy segments included the Top Ten Signs You Know Nothing About Foreign Policy. It was pretty amusing:

Tom Hanks was the couch guest. He is the new film Cloud Atlas. The interview was terrific. Tom was personable, animated, fun and told some interesting and entertaining stories. He’s such a decent and talented person that he makes a perfect guest for a talk show. He even succeed in making Dave laugh multiple times. Here are some clips:

Tony Bennett and Juan Luis Guerra were the musical guests. They gave a nice performance:

Great show. I give it:

– Woody

Posted In: Late Night