Tonight Show Highlights

Here were my favorite monologue jokes from last night’s Tonight Show with Jay Leno.

This is kinda scary: today the Secret Service caught a woman trying to sneak into the White House with a mysterious package. Turns out it was just Ann Romney with some carpet samples.

A two-thousand-year-old mummy was just discovered with a mouth full of cavities. A mummy with a mouth full of cavities. You know what they call that in England: the Queen.

In his new book Arnold Schwarzenegger says that he and Bridget Nielson had an affair back in 1985. I didn’t even know she worked as a maid.

The comedy segment was Does This Thrill Bill. It was actually pretty damn funny to watch:

Chelsea Handler was the first couch guest. She is the host of the show Chelsea Lately. I watched the entire interview twice and I’m of two minds on it. One side of my mind, I’m not sure if it’s the right or left, really liked the interview for the harsh back-and-forth between Jay and Chelsea. Their banter was enjoyable to watch, as both sides fired some decent zingers at each other. The other side of my mind didn’t like the interview because it found Chelsea’s personality to be more annoying than funny. I guess in the end I consider it my responsibility to rate the interview segment as a whole, and not just the interviewee. So here you go:

Placido Domingo was the second couch guest. He is a world-renowned opera singer. The interview was mostly pretty “meh.” It seemed like he was trying too hard to be funny. There was a minute in the middle where he was more genuine, though. I just wish the rest of the interview had been more like that sixty seconds. Here’s that minute:

Placido Domingo was also the musical guest. He gave a really nice performance.

Good show. I give it:

– Woody

Posted In: Late Night