Tonight Show Highlights

Here were my favorite monologue jokes from last night’s Tonight Show with Jay Leno.

A woman is suing her plastic surgeon for accidentally joining her breasts together. Been a rough week for Nancy Grace, hasn’t it?

She won a huge judgment from the plastic surgeon. He botched her boob job, leaving her with one big boob. But the story has a happy ending. She’s now dating a guy who just has one hand.

Hallmark has just launched a line of unemployment cards. They’re “sorry you lost your job” cards, and you send them to unemployed friends. And what’s really insulting: the cards are made in China.

The Desk Segment was Does This Thrill Bill? It was pretty thrilling because Shatner was such a huge ham. Unfortunately the entire segment isn’t available, but here’s a clip of one of the contestants:

Ed Helms was the first couch guest. He is one of the stars of The Office. The interview was fine, but not very exciting. Ed is a super nice guy, and I bet he’d be fun to hang out with if you want to see a movie or something, but overall everything about the segment, from Jay’s questions, to Ed’s stories, just wasn’t that interesting to me.

Deena Nicole Cortese was the second couch guest. She is on Jersey Shore. Boy, she couldn’t be a more polar opposite to Ed. The interview was fine for what it was. I, again, did not find it very interesting, but for different reasons that shouldn’t be too hard to discern.

Lisa Hannigan was the musical guest. She was terrific.

Fine show. I give it:

– Woody


Posted In: Late Night