Late Late Show Highlights

The pre-opening credit segment can be skipped, so here were my favorite monologue jokes from last night’s Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson:

There’s so much going on I don’t know where to begin tonight. The gas prices are rising, the presidential race is beginning to heat up, the trouble in the Middle East is going crazy. But none of that really concerns me, you know why, because this week is National Library Week. Try to contain your enthusiasm.

This is the week when we celebrate our nation’s libraries by…returning books that are overdue. I’ve still got my copy of Y2K for Dummies. I actually was very worried about that Y2K thing, but weirdly enough not until a couple of months ago.

I return my books on time. I’ve never understood people who hold on to them forever. The whole concept of borrowing means you at some point return it, unless, of course, it’s a necklace and you’re Lindsey Lohan.

Libraries need all the help they can get. I support American libraries: they’re forgotten, they’re run-down, and they don’t make any money – they’re like Blockbuster Video.

On last night’s 60 Minutes Morley Safer did a story about the Vatican Library. They wheeled out this fragile, yellow thing that was over 1,000 years-old. And when they were done with Morley Safer they brought out some old books.

The desk segment was checking the tweets and emails. It was pretty entertaining:


Isabella Rossellini was the first couch guest. She stars in a documentary called Animals Distract Me. The interview was fine. Isabella is a neat person who played will with Ferguson, I just felt the segment was too low-key.

Casey Wilson was the second couch guest. She is in the new show Happy Endings. The interview was terrific. Craig and Casey were really dynamic and hilarious together. It’s worth watching:


And the closing segment can be skipped. So…

Good show. I give it:

– Woody

Posted In: Late Night