Tonight Show Highlights

Here were my favorite monologue jokes from last night’s Tonight Show with Jay Leno:

Not a good day for Lindsey Lohan. The judge told her that even if she plea-bargains she’s going to go to jail. She could get three years in jail, which in celebrity-time is almost two days.

I’m not sure Lindsey gets it. She doesn’t want to go to jail. Did you hear what she wants? She said she’d offer to do 200 hours of community service at Charlie Sheen’s house. I don’t think that counts.

The king of Saudi Arabia returned to his country today following back surgery. I don’t know how he hurt his back, but I think we can rule out bending over backwards to keep oil prices low.

In a defiant speech on state television Moammar Gadhafi said, “I will not leave and I will die as a martyr.” I’m sorry, that was the Governor of Wisconsin.

The desk segment was Dealing with the Public. I’ve seen some of these clips online, but there were a couple of funny ones that were new to me. You might enjoy watching it:

Randy Jackson was the first couch guest. He’s a judge on the show American Idol. The interview was pretty good. I don’t watch American Idol but found some of the stories interesting regardless. Randy is just such a happy guy, it’s hard not to enjoy listening to him talk. Plus, he and Jay have pretty good mojo together. Here’s the first half of the interview:

Nick Swardson was the second couch guest. He’s a stand-up comedian and in the new film Just Go With It. Nick was very funny and the interview was really entertaining. Here’s the first half:

Travie McCoy was the musical guest. He was fine.

Good show. I give it:

– Woody

Posted In: Late Night