Tonight Show Highlights

Better late than never, here were my favorite monologue jokes from last night’s Tonight Show with Jay Leno:

President Obama made a surprise visit to Afghanistan this past weekend. I guess after the last fourteen months in Washington he wanted to go someplace where there was less fighting.

The FBI is now saying that Al-Qaeda may be planning an attack on a US sports stadium. See, I don’t think Al-Qaeda has any idea about our sports. You know what their big plan is? To hit Wrigley Field during the World Series.

Over in Afghanistan the US Military is now using pilot-less drones to attack Al-Qaeda. Do you know what those are? It’s a plane, it doesn’t have any pilot, it’s flown by remote control by someone on the ground. Or as Southwest calls that: the next step.

Did you see the picture in the news of that sixteen year-old kid from China with the ten-inch knife through his head? This kid was having an argument over a computer game with a friend, and his friend stuck a ten-inch knife all the way through his head. Now the kid is going to be fine. Although doctors did say until his brain recovers he’ll only be able to do math and science at an American student level.

The desk segment was headlines. It was pretty funny:

Lauren Graham was the first couch guest. She’s on the NBC show Parenthood. The interview was good. Lauren was very energetic, laughed a lot and went out of her way to be funny. To be honest, however, there wasn’t a must-see moment during her time with Jay, so we’re going to skip the clips if that’s ok with you? It is? Good.

Karl Rove was the second couch guest. The interview was interesting and I think is worth watching for two reasons. First, regardless of your opinion of him or former President Bush, it’s an opportunity to learn more about a very influential person in American politics over the last decade. Second it’s fascinating to listen to how the audience responds to some of his answers.

Joss Stone was the musical guest. She has a great voice and gave a really nice performance.

Good show. I give it:

– Woody


Posted In: Late Night